The Mind of a Man

"If you’re not married, or single, or unhappy, then life is working out as it should."  -John DeVore

This article/blog couldn't have been posted at a more appropriate time. Not only did my frisky loving junky friend send me the link to this article, but it was also the subject of my weekly frisky blast email update. Again, you can read the article in it's entirety here, but I wanted to comment on a few of the things the author, John DeVore, reminded me of.  He writes:

The reason you’re not married yet is because I don’t really care why you’re not married and no one else does, either. Seriously, nobody cares. You shouldn’t care. Marriage isn’t a tiara. It’s not a ribbon to cut or one of those big novelty lottery checks. You don’t “deserve” a husband. You’re not Veruca Salt. You should be happy with whatever life gives you, because the only thing you truly “deserve” is a grave, although there just aren’t enough funeral pyres in these modern times. But I don’t want you to freak out. If you’re not married, or single, or unhappy, then life is working out as it should. No one has a right to happiness. As Americans, we only have a right to the pursuit of happiness. This explains why we love cars so much. The road trip is more important than the tourist trap. Enjoy the view. Roll down the window.

You’re not married because that’s not where you are in the story of your life right now. Take a moment to breathe. Put your feet up. [...]  Wherever you are in life, really, that’s where you’re supposed to be. That’s not some hippie jive talk. That is the truth.

I will admit, I've caught myself obsessing over the "woe is me" a handful of times.  But lately, it's been others pushing me to pursue dating that has really annoyed me.  I've thought about blogging about this in the past but never got around to it.  Why is it everyone thinks I need someone?  Why can't people just get it through their heads that I am totally fine being single right now.  I could care less if I have a date this week or not or if I meet someone out at the bars to buy my drinks.  Honestly, I am so happy and content with my life right now I know it's right where I am supposed to be.  For years, and I'm talking YEARS I have been in and out of relationships like no body's business.  Starting in preschool.

Boys NEVER had cooties in my eyes.  My boyfriend in elementary was named Jake (be it childish or not, I was "taken").  He was my boyfriend starting in 1st grade through the 5th grade. It was super serious.  He was my guarnatneed couples skate partner which meant I could actually hold his hand for 3 minutes...6 minutes if we were lucky enough for them to play two songs at our monthly school skates.  He bought me Valentine's and Christmas gifts.  We were the "it" couple of Lincoln Elementary and we may have even exchanged a peck or two on the playground after he "caught" me playing chase.  We only broke up once our elementary days were over and there were new fish in the pond as we moved on to Middle School.

My middle school years were less exciting as I was an aero dynamic (as Sharif put it) late developer.  I'm sure you can figure out what that means.  I had random boyfriends here and there, but only the ones who weren't worried about my cup size (or lack there of) and whether or not I would still share my homework with them.  Then in high school it got all serious again as I started dating older boys...with boobs I might add (me, not them).  I met my high school sweetheart sophomore year and continued to date him through my first year of college.  He was then quickly replaced within weeks by my college sweetheart who was then quickly replaced by my Kansas City sweetheart.  See what I mean? 

I JUST WANT TO BE SINGLE.  Life is working out as it should.  I have a college degree, a Master's degree and I'm about to have my second Master's degree at the end of this year.  I am supposed to be alone right now and I accept that.  My purpose for dating as little as possible is this - I don't want to get attached to anyone in this crap city because the day I graduate my little ass is G-O-N-E.  Sure it's fun to go to dinner with guys every now and then, but I seriously feel bad.  I don't want to lead anyone on.  So if you're reading this and want to ask me out (or have and now you haven't heard from me), that is why.  Those who I've gone out with, thank you for dinner, drinks and your company.  I truly did enjoy it.  But a relationship just isn't in the cards for me right now.  I'm pretty sure this weekend I used a line that went something like this, "You aren't going to like, call me now are you?"  Yes, including the "like."  But on the other hand, if you've been wanting to ask me out, I'd love to - but know that it probably won't go anywhere - and if you'll let me, I'll even split the bill. 

So thank you John for reminding me, this is exactly where I'm supposed to be in life right now.

-Stay Sassy, xo 

6 Reasons Why I'm Apparently Not Marriage Material

I'll admit, I spend plenty of time reading articles on thefrisky.com about life, love and relationships.  Some of them are quite interesting.  But when my gal pal suggested I check this article out, I wasn't sure what to think.  It's actually from Huffington Post but was linked in an article on the frisky.  First problem - this article is being written by some woman on marriage No. 3, two shy of Chanel's most famous scent No. 5.  This smells fishy - tell me again why I should believe anything you have to say?  Precisely.  You can read the article in its entirety here, but I'm just going to go over her top six reasons why I'm not married.

WHY YOU'RE NOT MARRIED - TRACY McMILLAN

1. You're a Bitch.

Here's what I mean by bitch. I mean you're angry. You probably don't think you're angry. You think you're super smart, or if you've been to a lot of therapy, that you're setting boundaries. But the truth is you're pissed. At your mom. At the military-industrial complex. At Sarah Palin. And it's scaring men off.

The deal is: most men just want to marry someone who is nice to them. I am the mother of a 13-year-old boy, which is like living with the single-cell protozoa version of a husband. Here's what my son wants out of life: macaroni and cheese, a video game, and Kim Kardashian. Have you ever seen Kim Kardashian angry? I didn't think so. You've seen Kim Kardashian smile, wiggle, and make a sex tape. Female anger terrifies men. I know it seems unfair that you have to work around a man's fear and insecurity in order to get married -- but actually, it's perfect, since working around a man's fear and insecurity is big part of what you'll be doing as a wife. 

Me? A bitch? No way.  That's the silliest thing I've ever heard!  No one has ever called me a bitch.  Clearly the exact opposite is true.  The word "bitch" no longer even phases me.  But am I really angry at the world?  Hardly.  I don't go out of my way to be a bitch and if I'm a bitch to anyone 8/10 times it's another girl.  Girls are bitches.  Bottom line.  But I can't agree that I'm angry at the world or mean to boys.  That is unless they provoke me.  And if that's the case, they suck anyway and aren't worth my time.  And by the way - It's called being sassy. 

2. You're Shallow.

When it comes to choosing a husband, only one thing really, truly matters: character. So it stands to reason that a man's character should be at the top of the list of things you are looking for, right? But if you're not married, I already know it isn't. Because if you were looking for a man of character, you would have found one by now. Men of character are, by definition, willing to commit.

Instead, you are looking for someone tall. Or rich. Or someone who knows what an Eames chair is. Unfortunately, this is not the thinking of a wife. This is the thinking of a teenaged girl. And men of character do not want to marry teenaged girls. Because teenage girls are never happy. And they never feel like cooking, either.

Shallow?  Okay.  Maybe I'll agree.  But because I'm typically attracted to men taller than myself, I don't think that makes me shallow...only short.  And honestly, I could care less about his bank account - I'll be making my own damn money.  A little extra money never hurt though.  Am I really that shallow just because I want a below the line letter in my last name?  You know, like a "y" or a "g".  I just like the way those look.  And as my gal pal said - she just likes big, strong men.  So what if she wants to marry a professional football player.  A girl can dream right?  
*FYI - the below the line letter thing...only a joke.  Kind of.

3. You're a Slut.

Hooking up with some guy in a hot tub on a rooftop is fine for the ladies of Jersey Shore -- but they're not trying to get married. You are. Which means, unfortunately, that if you're having sex outside committed relationships, you will have to stop. Why? Because past a certain age, casual sex is like recreational heroin -- it doesn't stay recreational for long.

That's due in part to this thing called oxytocin -- a bonding hormone that is released when a woman a) nurses her baby and b) has an orgasm -- that will totally mess up your casual-sex game. It's why you can be f**k-buddying with some dude who isn't even all that great and the next thing you know, you're totally strung out on him. And you have no idea how it happened. Oxytocin, that's how it happened. And since nature can't discriminate between marriage material and Charlie Sheen, you're going to have to start being way more selective than you are right now.

You got me there.  I'm a HUGE slut.  It's crazy how slutty I am.  This couldn't be more far from the truth.  I would never hook up with some rando in a hot tub.  Do you know how many germs circulate in those things?  SICK.  Casual relationships this day in age do not make someone slutty.  Boys get high fives.  Girls get called a slut.  It's dumb.  Own your sexuality and do whatever you want - just be safe.  

4. You're a Liar.

It usually goes something like this: you meet a guy who is cute and likes you, but he's not really available for a relationship. He has some condition that absolutely precludes his availability, like he's married, or he gets around town on a skateboard. Or maybe he just comes right out and says something cryptic and open to interpretation like, "I'm not really available for a relationship right now."

You know if you tell him the truth -- that you're ready for marriage -- he will stop calling. Usually that day. And you don't want that. So you just tell him how perfect this is because you only want to have sex for fun! You love having fun sex! And you don't want to get in a relationship at all! You swear! 

About ten minutes later, the oxytocin kicks in. You start wanting more. But you don't tell him that. That's your secret -- just between you and 22,000 of your closest girlfriends. Instead, you hang around, having sex with him, waiting for him to figure out that he can't live without you. I have news: he will never "figure" this out. He already knows he can live without you just fine. And so do you. Or you wouldn't be lying to him in the first place.

Probably hit the nail on the head with this one.  Of course I can change any guy's mind.  You don't want a relationship right now?  Just wait until you get a taste of me, I'll change your mind.   How many times have you thought that?  DUMBEST THOUGHT EVER.  It's only taken me 9 plus months to start to figure that out.

5. You're Selfish.

If you're not married, chances are you think a lot about you. You think about your thighs, your outfits, your naso-labial folds. You think about your career, or if you don't have one, you think about doing yoga teacher training. Sometimes you think about how marrying a wealthy guy -- or at least a guy with a really, really good job -- would solve all your problems. 

Howevs, a good wife, even a halfway decent one, does not spend most of her day thinking about herself. She has too much s**t to do, especially after having kids. This is why you see a lot of celebrity women getting husbands after they adopt. The kids put the woman on notice: Bitch, hello! It's not all about you anymore! After a year or two of thinking about someone other than herself, suddenly, Brad Pitt or Harrison Ford comes along and decides to significantly other her. Which is also to say -- if what you really want is a baby, go get you one. Your husband will be along shortly. Motherhood has a way of weeding out the lotharios.

So wrong.  I have a dog.  Might as well be a baby.  I have to feed her.  Take her out to poop and pee --- and clean her ass when she gets dingle berries. Clean up her vomit.  Let her play.  Pay for shots.  Find dog sitters.  It's all the same, right?  I kid...I know what you moms are thinking.  
Seriously though, you can better believe I am thinking about my thighs, outfits and naso-labial folds.  And so are 12,000,0000 other moms out there.  No matter if I'm married, single or in a relationship, the gym will most likely be a part of my regimen.  Including shopping.  And Botox and fillers.  Call me selfish --- whatevs.  I think it's more about me caring about my body, staying healthy and looking my best.  But I doubt that's why I'm not married.

6. You're Not Good Enough.

Oh, I don't think that. You do. I can tell because you're not looking for a partner who is your equal. No, you want someone better than you are: better looking, better family, better job.

Here is what you need to know: You are enough right this minute. Period. Not understanding this is a major obstacle to getting married, since women who don't know their own worth make terrible wives. Why? You can fake it for a while, but ultimately you won't love your spouse any better than you love yourself. Smart men know this.

I see this at my son's artsy, progressive school. Of 183 kids, maybe six have moms who are as cute as you're trying to be. They're attractive, sure. They're just not objects. Their husbands (wisely) chose them for their character, not their cup size. 

So far from the truth. I never want to date someone who is better looking than me or takes longer than me to get ready.  And I love myself and being who I am.  Maybe I'm hard on myself some days and obsess over a couple pounds I gained or the new wrinkle that seems to have popped up - but what woman doesn't?

So I may be one or more of all of the above. But that's who I am. Take it or leave it. I'm so glad Tracy knows why I'm single - maybe she should take a few minutes and reflect why she's been married three times instead of trying to tell us single girls why we're alone.  Clearly she's the one who doesn't know how to "pick" the right guys.  


The reason I'm not married, engaged, or in a relationship? --- I own my singleness and that's why I'm single. I go on dates and I may kiss a boy here and there. If I wanted more, I could have more. So Tracy, you can take your 6 reasons and shove it.

-Stay Sassy, xo

Remembering Megan

Love is patient, love is kind. It is not jealous, is not pompous, it is not inflated, it is not rude, it does not seek its own interests, it is not quick-tempered, it does not brood over injury, it does not rejoice over wrongdoing but rejoices with the truth. It bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things, endures all things.

Love never fails.

Megan Alessa Mallatt
10.26.85 - 2.15.04

Today marks another anniversary for the Pittsburg community.  Today we remember another one of ours taken much too soon.  Today, we remember Megan.

Megan was one of those girls you wanted to hate.  And I mean that in the most sincere way possible. She clearly was stunning.  Her long blonde hair was perfect in every way.  And her eyes were just as gorgeous.  She was smart, popular and so much fun.  As an incoming freshman she was one of those girls the upperclassmen boys were already talking about and many of us girls envied.  But there was absolutely no way you couldn't like Megan.  No matter how hard you tried, her smile and laughter were un-hateable.  So you can imagine how stunned our community was to lose such a gorgeous, bright young star.   

     

I had the pleasure of spending countless hours with Megan as members of the dance team in high school.   We were on the squad for two years together which meant 7:30 AM practices Monday through Friday and of course DANCE CAMP!!!  One of the funniest things I remember about Megan was her obsession with skin.  And by skin, I mean dead, peeling skin.  I'll never forget us gawking over how disgusting we thought it was that she loved peeling Vanessa's sunburned skin off her shoulders.  She would have made an awesome dermatologist!

Blaire (Jr), Me (Sr) and Megan (Soph)

Winter Homecoming 2002

In high school, for whatever reason, I thought it would be a fabulous idea to record my senior year.  Every party I toted a sweet video camera and recorded all the shenanigans of teenage life in Pittsburg, KS.  I remember Megan recording one night and accidentally dropping the camera.  She felt so bad but we giggled it off as she apologized to the camera itself for dropping it.

Those are just a few of the several memories I have with her.  There were plenty of others.  Birthday parties at her house, homecoming dances and concerts.

Megan filled our lives with joy.  It's hard not to be sad when thinking of her.  It's hard not knowing where she'd be today.  The last time I talked to her was about a month and a half before she died.  She had been accepted to KU and I was so excited she would be joining me. We'd already teared up Mass St. a few years earlier when we went to visit her brother, Ryan and somehow got in to the bars as little naive high schoolers.

To Megan's family:  I can't imagine how hard it is to see all of us growing up.  To watch as we get married and have children knowing Megan was robbed of all of those precious things in life little girls dream of.  But as we continue to grow old, get married and have babies know there is a little bit of Megan in us all.  I know she'll be there with me when I finally walk down the aisle.  Megan was a true blessing.  I hope that you find comfort in knowing how loved she was and how much she impacted every person's life she ever encountered.  She truly was an angel sent from God.  Rejoice in the 18 years you had with her.  Brenda & Keith - you should be proud of the wonderful daughter you raised.  Never forget that.

Join her Facebook page:  In Loving Memory

So today marks another anniversary.  Another year without.  Without her physical presence only.  She's here with us everyday.  Just look around.  The warmth of the sun.  The chill of a cool breeze. The chirping of a spring song.  The petal of a newly budded rose.  All the beauty of the world is Megan.

-Stay Sassy, xo 

Living in a Facebook World

Holy shit.  What has Facebook done to our society?!  Apparently I missed this commercial during the Super Bowl or I most definitely would have been blogging about it sooner.  I saw this commercial last night while watching the Grammys.  My first few thoughts - did that seriously just happen?  Is this seriously the next big thing?  Am I really going to be choosing this amenity on my next car? Yes, yes, and yes.

The obvious response to this commercial - if you can't wait until you get home to check your Facebook, you have serious issues.  But honestly, I think this is pretty sweet.  Not only have I been guilty of texting while driving (bad dog) but I have also Facebooked while driving (bad, bad dog).  The other problem with this commercial...that chick must have SPRINTED to her computer after he dropped her off to write on his wall.  Or maybe she did it while he was driving.  I don't know, but she is making this way to easy for him.  At least make him wait and wonder how it was for a day or two.  Everyone knows boys love the chase and if you give them the goods too soon they're over you like last months Playboy.  By the way...doesn't she know the rules of dating?  In my rule book you will never pick me up on a first date.  No way in hell is some guy I barely know going to know where I live.  Too many creepies out there...I know this from personal experiences.  I will meet you there and I will go home alone.  And I probably won't talk to you again.  Duh.

Either way, my car reading me my latest Facebook posts is pretty legit in my book.  Facebook isn't going anywhere anytime soon so might as well get used to this ridiculousness.  Oh...and if my car can read my Facebook status, could you please also have my car read my text messages and reply as well? Please and thanks.  Or has that already been invented, too?

-Stay Sassy, xo

P.S.  HAPPY FRICKIN VALENTINE'S DAY TO YOU. 
If you're looking for my Valentine's Day blog - check it out here...I posted a few days prematurely.

GLEE Be Gone

Several of my friends love Glee.  I just don't get it.  I've tried on a few occasions to give it a chance. It just doesn't seem to tickle my fancy.  Watching the Grammys tonight I was shocked to see the Glee cast nominated for a Grammy.  ARE YOU SERIOUS?  How is this possible?  How could the Glee cast actually be nominated for a Grammy?  I'm not saying they don't have musical talent...but come on!  

Here's what I don't understand about Glee.  They're so unoriginal.  All they do is cover other artist's songs.  I can almost guarantee if any other latest artist covered songs, people would be ragging.  I get that it's based on high school stereotype drama and in choir all you do is sing other people's songs.  But why must they ruin every pop song.  I don't even find the show funny.  Just alarmingly dumb.  Even worse, I seriously get pissed off when their songs play on the radio.  It's bullshit.

  

Sorry to all of you who love Glee.  I just had to get it off my chest that Glee is the dumbest show ever.  You all can continue to waste an hour of your week on that show.  That's fine.  But seriously, do the rest of us a favor and keep their crap music off the radio.

-Stay Sassy, xo

**Image courtesy of somebody else's blog

FU VDAY

Let me take this moment to be a bitter single bitch this Valentine's Day season.  Most days I can handle being alone.  Most days I actually enjoy being single.  I have no one to answer to.  I don't have to confirm my weekend plans with anyone except those I'm spending the evening with.  It's great.  But Valentine's Day...that's another story.  Someone told me to just not think about it (clearly a dude).  Okay...right.  It must be that simple. 

Not think about it?  How are you supposed to not think about it when walking through the grocery store you are surrounded by gushy "I Love You" balloons, cards, candy and all those dumb stuffed animals?  ***see ADDENDUM below***

Avoid the grocery store?  Okay.

Then there's the radio.  Every radio station is talking about what to get your Valentine this year.  All the latest polls with all the latest fads.  Then of course the ads...oh the ads.  Get your Valentine roses from here, pre-order from there.  Make reservations here. 

Turn off the radio?  Okay.

Oh...side note...by the way -  if you're interested...White Castle will lay down table cloths and put flowers on the table for you this Valentine's Day.  Seriously.  I heard it on the radio.  Reallll classy.  If my imaginary boyfriend took me to White Castle for slingers on V-day I would break up with him on the spot.  Probably after I slapped him across the face and called him a few inappropriate names that I won't say because my mother might read this.

Make your reservations here.

And then there's Facebook. Ohhh Facebook.  I can't tell you how many times I've stumbled across post this as your status if you have a man that you love and blah blah blah...BULLSHIT!  Change your profile picture to you and the person you love to show them how special they are to you.  Okay!  Is it appropriate for me to post a picture of Hiroshima?  I think not.

Get off Facebook?  Yea right.

So all you love birds out there, enjoy your Valentine's Day with your sweet heart(s).  And ladies - please, please, please post pictures of the flowers he sent you, the diamonds he gave you and whatever else so that all of us singles can be reminded that we didn't get shit.  Just remember though, as stated above,  my Valentine runs on batteries...therefore when your Valentine "goes" for the last time...mine will keep going...and going...and going...and going...

-Stay Sassy, xo


ADDENDUM:
So I just ran to Walgreens to get stamps to send a few Valentine's Day cards (see, I'm not totally bitter) and much to my surprise...I immediately laughed to myself when I walked through the door  at the irony of the situation.  There was no way I could pass this up.  I went back to my car to grab my phone to snag a few photos like a Chinese tourist.


EXHIBIT A:

EXHIBIT B:

Now you try to ignore that...

10,000 Thanks

Thank You for double clicking your mouse!

(on my blog link...duh)

It's been three months almost to the day since I started this whole blog thing.  As of today I reached 10,000 hits therefore this post is a THANK YOU!  I remember when I couldn't wait for the ticker to reach 1,000!  So thank you to each of you who officially "follow" my blog and those of you who read my blog.  As I said in the beginning, I didn't really know what my purpose was...and well I still really don't.  I just know that I love writing in my free time, I love being a jokester, I love making people laugh and I LOVE BEING SASSY!  Also, I especially love it when I receive comments and messages from YOU, the readers telling me how much you enjoy reading my blogs.  At the end of the day, knowing I made you smile or laugh totally brightens my day.  So a BIGGER thanks to those of you who have personally messaged me and personally approached me in public.  You're the best!  

10,000 Clicks from all over the World!

It's been a bit bumpy along the way and I cannot thank those of you enough who stood up for me and left encouraging comments when others were not being so encouraging and down right mean.  Please keep the comments and/or suggestions coming!!!

I cannot promise any time frame on how long I'll continue to blog, but for right now it works.  So I hope you all continue to read my blog and leave your comments either here or on Facebook. That's all for now...here's to another 10,000 clicks!

-Stay Sassy, xo

Super Bowl Commercial Bust

Was anyone as disappointed in the Super Bowl commercials as I was??  Commercials allegedly cost $3 Million for 30 seconds.  What happened to the "good ol days" of hilarious commercials done by Budweiser?  Sorry, but Kim Kardashian (although I love her) was a let down.  Don't get me wrong, she looked hot, her tits looked great and every guy dreams of KK saying "You're ammaaazing" to them, but no matter how hot she is...Shape-Ups are still sick.  Even she doesn't make them look hot - not even in pink.  Plus, we ALL know that ass came waayyyyy before the invention of Shape-Ups.  Skechers, you don't convince me for a second that Shape-Ups will give my booty curves like hers.  It's humanly impossible.  And the dude at the end wearing Shape-Ups...GET REAL.  If I EVER see a guy at the gym or in public wearing shape-ups, you bet your ass I'm probably going to gawk and stare and then laugh.  You want a tight ass?  Do some squats.



Best Buy - your ad with Justin Bieber and Ozzy Osborn was a waste of $3 Million.  What exactly were you even going for?  So technology moves fast?  And Justin Bieber is the latest teen heart throb?  Pretty sure Ozzy was never a teen heart throb.  Am I missing the connection?  Not even worthy of re-posting.

Doritos/Pepsi Max had 6 commercials.  That's $18 Million (I know, I'm super good at math).  Seriously?  SERIOUSLY?...there's starving children somewhere.  Next time save the $18,000,000 you spent on commercials and donate a few bags of Doritos to some third world country.  But I must admit, the Doritos "The Best Part" commercial was one of my favs...even if it was slightly creepy.  MMM...CHEESE...I love Doritos!



My only other fav (aka the only one I can remember laughing at)...the e*trade commercial.  I just love the talking babies.  They crack me up every time.  This baby clearly has a perfect Enzo.

This picture doesn't even do him justice.  But I
couldn't find a better one and didn't really feel
like spending hours searching for a picture of
his rear end.

So I didn't really enjoy the commercials too much.  And the half time show by The Black Eyed Peas was about as entertaining as watching Marley take a poo in the middle of a snow storm.  It sucked.  At least I got to see a lot of Jordy Nelson in tight pants.  Way to represent the lovely state of Kansas.  You did me proud.  I'll be dreaming of you and that tight ass all night!


GREEN & YELLOW! GREEN & YELLOW! GREEN & YELLOW! CHEESEHEAD! Rapelisberger...that's KARMA.

-Stay Sassy, xo

If loving Mila Kunis is wrong, I don't want to be right.

She's at it again...looking hotter than ever.  I can't get enough of her!  Could she seriously be any more gorgeous?!  Macaulay Culkin was a very lucky guy.  I can't wait to see which celeb will snag her next!

Here are some of the latest photos I stumbled across while catching up on celebrity gossip.  Apparently she's the latest face to grace the covers of LA Magazine.  

She's clearly still rocking those ballerina legs from Black Swan.

Images courtesy of Pop Sugar

What's next for Mila Kunis?  I can't wait to see.  And don't worry, I'll be eargly awaiting...and most likely stalking....in a friendly, non-lesbian kind of way.

-Stay Sassy, xo

Hey grl - Gr8 2 C U last nite. U want 2 go on a D8 this wk? Lol :)

I sometimes wonder what life would be like without texting.  Over the past few years I have become more and more resentful to talking on the phone.  It used to be I would really only talk to one person on the phone...my mom.  Talking to her daily was too much for me.  I found myself annoyed when the phone rang and instead of being grateful she cared so much, I was bothered that she was calling me yet again to ask me one question.  I was so relieved when she finally learned how to text.  Now she can send me a text every time she thinks of me and I can respond when I have time.  Instead of me feeling annoyed every time she calls, I feel less stress to communicate with her.  

I do realize sometimes people just want to communicate and actually talk to one another, but I am not one of those people.  I love catching up with my friends when I actually do sit down and make myself do it, but up until that point, I honestly dread it.  Shooting a quick text message is so much easier for me to do while I study or am occupied by other things.  I can quickly respond to someone's question or simple hello and get back to studying in between texts.  I simply find it easier.

What really blows my mind is how the heck people dated not only before text messaging, but before cell phones.  First off, let me preface this. I am by NO MEANS attacking any guys whom I have "dated" in the past.  But honestly, I cannot remember ever being asked out on a date by a guy over the phone or in person.  But I'm not necessarily complaining either.  Some people think that it is absolutely ridiculous and a guy should never ask a girl out via text message.  Honestly, I don't really mind it.  If I want to go, you'll know it.  And if I don't...well it makes it a whole helleva lot easier for me to turn you down by simply not responding, or fabricating some lie like I have to wash my hair.  

I spent this past NYE with one of my most favorite married couples in Kansas City. They are in their mid-30s and I couldn't get enough of their stories about dating in college.  If you wanted to hook up after bar close, you had to actually call the lucky mate's land line.  Who even has land lines anymore?  Even better in her story, when a guy would call, he had to specify which of her roommates he was looking for, because there were two with the same name!  I can't even imagine receiving a booty call via land line. Or being asked on a date via land line for that matter!   If you didn't physically exchange numbers on a piece of paper or something, you most likely wouldn't be following up the next week.  There was no Facebook to go home to and stalk to try to find him/her so you could friend one another.  That was it.  If you didn't exchange numbers, you blew your chance.  If you were lucky enough to make it home without losing the number, the drunk gods were looking over you.

A world without cell phones blows my mind but I won't be turning my back on texting, sexting or digi-dating anytime soon!  After all, nobody really wants to hurt anyone's feelings here.  And it's honestly a win-win situation.  I don't feel as bad telling you no, and you don't feel as pathetic being turned down face-to-face.  TXT YA L8R!

-Stay Sassy, xo

True Life: It's MY BIRTHDAY

"Growing old is mandatory; growing up is optional." - Chili Davis

I'm special.  Campus was closed for me.  I'm snowed/iced in my apartment with my puppy and my mom in the midst of Winter Blast 2011. With all the weather predictions, it better get a lot worse than this and be gone by Friday for my Wiggin' Out Celebration.  But for today, my "Wine Cellar" is stocked.  And my toes are cold.  What better way to celebrate than to look back on my "younger years"...

"And in the end, it's not the years in your life that count.  It's the life in your years." - Abraham Lincoln

-Stay Sassy, xo