Pray for Joplin, MO

Feeling so absolutely blessed as I snuggle with my little one and she licks the tears from my face. My heart aches for Joplin. Those whose lives were lost, those who are still missing, the furry companions missing from their owners and those found and waiting to be claimed. My stomach is in knots over and over again as I see facebook pages for missing persons.  Pages honoring those lost.  And even more frightening, facebook statuses reporting people are once again taking cover in Joplin as the tornado sirens yet again are going off.

Whatever your religion, whomever is your God.  Pray.
 ☮♥†

ASA: Only the good die young

It's something unpredictable, but in the end it's right

I hope you had the time of your life...

-Green Day

Today marks another anniversary. But the significance of this day is a little bit different than some of the anniversaries I’ve blogged about. Eleven years ago today marks the start of a trend I wish would have never begun. Eleven years ago today I was 16 years old enjoying life being a typical boy-crazed teenager. I don’t think I’ll ever forget April 13, 2000. 

My best friends at the time (Tara, Ashley C. and Ashley R.) were over at my house making our own personalized Sophomore Tanks to wear the next day at school because we were having class competitions.  We were super excited for the events, specifically because we were going up against the senior girls who weren’t exactly fond of us (and for the record – we beat them in tug-of-war, yes I remember). 

Then came the phone call that changed everything. I answered the phone and it was another classmate calling me whose father had a scanner. The convo went something like, “Melissa, have you heard about Abby?” I responded no and she said, “I hate to be the one to tell you this, but I think she’s been in an accident and didn’t make it.” I didn’t believe the words she had just said. I hung up the phone and raced to my dad and told him the rumor. At about that same time, my sister-in-law at the time, Teresa came by the house. She busted through the front door and confirmed the most tragic news to my 16-year-old self. I dropped to the ground and began sobbing. 

Abby, my dad/her grandpa, Me 

Up until April 13, 2000 I had never dealt with death. Sure three of my grandparents had passed away but that was years ago and before I understood the concept of losing a loved one. On April 13, 2000 not only did I lose a family member, but I also lost two more friends in the blink of an eye. On April 13, 2000 life and my concept of life, living, death and dying would be changed forever. On April 13, 2000 we lost Abby Brunetti, Salem Hayden and Ashley Harry. 

Growing up in a “smaller” town and living in Frontenac (while I went to Pittsburg schools) I was frequently around the Frontenac girls. My best friend and neighbor, Sarah went to Frontenac and we frequently played together when we were younger. Because of this, I was invited to her parties and knew several of the Frontenac girls my age. Also, my niece Abby was the same grade as me (don’t even ask me to explain that one) and I spent a lot of time with her, including the same Frontenac girls. Additionally, I spent several summers with Ashley. My babysitter Jill was best friends with her older sister Tiffany so we were around each other quite a lot.

Of course with growing up and starting high school, we weren’t as close as we once were. Abby and I still spent all holidays together and were even working together at Chicken Annie’s on the weekend to support our teenage lifestyles. I remember when she got her car and she took me for a ride. I remember when I finally got mine and taking her for a ride. We were growing up so fast. I can still hear her laugh.

Abby & Me before braces...eeks!

I didn’t know it at the time, but April 13, 2000 marked the first of many deaths I would be faced with over the next several years of my life. At 16 years old, no one should have to lose a friend; let alone 3 in one day. At 16 years old, no one should have to attend three funerals within two days, one of which being a family member. It’s so hard to understand why and each passing year doesn’t make it any easier.

It’s hard not to think about where each of them would have been today. It’s hard to not wonder why God chose them. One other girl was also in the car that day and thankfully survived. I often wonder if she remembers what they were talking about minutes before the accident happened. Who were they gossiping about? What song was on the radio? Were they singing along?

It doesn’t make it any easier to think about those things. All I can hope is that once the accident happened they each went fast and in peace. I can only hope that they rose to heaven, hand in hand, in no pain.

I still dream about Abby. She still looks the same as she did when she was 16. Giggly. Bubbly. Just as I remember her. I often have dreams that it was all a big mistake. That she just disappeared for a brief period of time. Then she comes back and life is just as it was. Finally, I wake up and realize it was all a dream even though for a brief moment it felt so real.

It may be eleven years later, but time doesn’t always heal all the pain.  Today we remember Abby Brunetti, the bubbly track star, Salem Haden the basketball star and Ashley Harry, the beautiful red-headed cheerleader.  Today as we remember, I ask that you share your favorite memories of the girls in the comments section below.  They all brought joy to our lives in their own unique way and those memories we will treasure and remember forever.

I love you girls.

-Stay Sassy, xo

Remembering Megan

Love is patient, love is kind. It is not jealous, is not pompous, it is not inflated, it is not rude, it does not seek its own interests, it is not quick-tempered, it does not brood over injury, it does not rejoice over wrongdoing but rejoices with the truth. It bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things, endures all things.

Love never fails.

Megan Alessa Mallatt
10.26.85 - 2.15.04

Today marks another anniversary for the Pittsburg community.  Today we remember another one of ours taken much too soon.  Today, we remember Megan.

Megan was one of those girls you wanted to hate.  And I mean that in the most sincere way possible. She clearly was stunning.  Her long blonde hair was perfect in every way.  And her eyes were just as gorgeous.  She was smart, popular and so much fun.  As an incoming freshman she was one of those girls the upperclassmen boys were already talking about and many of us girls envied.  But there was absolutely no way you couldn't like Megan.  No matter how hard you tried, her smile and laughter were un-hateable.  So you can imagine how stunned our community was to lose such a gorgeous, bright young star.   

     

I had the pleasure of spending countless hours with Megan as members of the dance team in high school.   We were on the squad for two years together which meant 7:30 AM practices Monday through Friday and of course DANCE CAMP!!!  One of the funniest things I remember about Megan was her obsession with skin.  And by skin, I mean dead, peeling skin.  I'll never forget us gawking over how disgusting we thought it was that she loved peeling Vanessa's sunburned skin off her shoulders.  She would have made an awesome dermatologist!

Blaire (Jr), Me (Sr) and Megan (Soph)

Winter Homecoming 2002

In high school, for whatever reason, I thought it would be a fabulous idea to record my senior year.  Every party I toted a sweet video camera and recorded all the shenanigans of teenage life in Pittsburg, KS.  I remember Megan recording one night and accidentally dropping the camera.  She felt so bad but we giggled it off as she apologized to the camera itself for dropping it.

Those are just a few of the several memories I have with her.  There were plenty of others.  Birthday parties at her house, homecoming dances and concerts.

Megan filled our lives with joy.  It's hard not to be sad when thinking of her.  It's hard not knowing where she'd be today.  The last time I talked to her was about a month and a half before she died.  She had been accepted to KU and I was so excited she would be joining me. We'd already teared up Mass St. a few years earlier when we went to visit her brother, Ryan and somehow got in to the bars as little naive high schoolers.

To Megan's family:  I can't imagine how hard it is to see all of us growing up.  To watch as we get married and have children knowing Megan was robbed of all of those precious things in life little girls dream of.  But as we continue to grow old, get married and have babies know there is a little bit of Megan in us all.  I know she'll be there with me when I finally walk down the aisle.  Megan was a true blessing.  I hope that you find comfort in knowing how loved she was and how much she impacted every person's life she ever encountered.  She truly was an angel sent from God.  Rejoice in the 18 years you had with her.  Brenda & Keith - you should be proud of the wonderful daughter you raised.  Never forget that.

Join her Facebook page:  In Loving Memory

So today marks another anniversary.  Another year without.  Without her physical presence only.  She's here with us everyday.  Just look around.  The warmth of the sun.  The chill of a cool breeze. The chirping of a spring song.  The petal of a newly budded rose.  All the beauty of the world is Megan.

-Stay Sassy, xo 

Remembering Zach

"Follow your heart - set your goals high. Take advantage of wonderful opportunities, they may never come again. We are so proud of you. Love, Mom, Dad, Kate and Reese."

-Senior Salute for Zach Willis (Aug 2nd 1984 - Nov. 9th 2003)

Today is the 7 year anniversary of the day we (the Pittsburg, KS community) tragically lost another life too soon.  Anyone who is from my hometown, or the SEK area will tell you - there's something in the water.  Our town is cursed.  Over the course of several years we have attended more funerals to pay tribute to friends lost than any one person should have to attend in their entire lives.  Beginning in 2000 with the loss of my family member, Abby Brunetti, I can personally count 7 funerals I've attended of friends lost whom I went to high school with...and those are only those funerals I was able to attend.  That doesn't even include the several others I wasn't able to pay respects to.  While that's a whole blog in itself, today I want to pay tribute to that (excuse my language) shit eating grin of Zach Willis that we all loved so much...

I can remember back to the days of ICQ in high school and then MSN in college.  Many late nights of conversations getting to know one another and talking about God knows what.  I would still chat with Zach frequently even after I graduated high school and went off to college.  We would talk about our dating lives and then when he was in college - the college life; his cut too short.  I think it's fair to say that Zach had a bit of a crush on me.  He was always throwing in a punch line and flirting with me.  I remember him asking me if I'd ever "go out" with him...as it was referred to in high school and me giggling like a young teen girl.  I'm not innocent either though, of course I'm sure I flirted back...hence the name his own sister gave me "D.T." (you can decipher that one) and the t-shirt she made me and forced me to wear on my 16th Birthday at school that had "D.T." plastered on the back - I wonder what the teachers thought about that one??  What can I say?  I'm a flirt.  I know this.  Most of all, I'll never forget his smile and his laugh.  You can see in his senior picture above what a fabulous smile he had.  But I can still hear and see him laughing.  I remember as if it was yesterday...when he would laugh he would through his head back and laugh...most likely after cracking a joke or making fun of me in some way.  I wish I could remember more of our times growing up and share them with you all today (especially you, Kate) but the memory that clouds all the rest is that amazing smile and laugh.

Follow your heart - set your goals high. Take advantage of wonderful opportunities, they may never come again.

If Zach were still with us today, I know he'd be doing amazing things.  He was so bright, so witty, and so smart with larger than life goals.  So today, take a moment to reflect on your life.  Have you taken advantage of all the wonderful opportunities that have come your way?  I'd like to think in most cases I have.  I've always said, "you can't put a price on experience" and because of that I truly think I have followed my heart in most aspects of my life - at least those I have control over.  This is also the reason I am in debt :) - but if I died tomorrow, I'd have no regrets.  Some chances may never come around again - so set your goals high, take a risk...and live life the way that Zach did...and most of all..smile and laugh along the way!

-xo