Love that Crimson & Blue

TWELVE DAYS UNTIL CHRISTMAS!

-Stay Sassy, xo

Go away!

Anonymous posts are not welcome here. If you don't like me or my blog, why are you wasting your time reading it? Many years ago I came to the realization that not everyone will like you and you won't get along with every person you encounter.  Therefore, I could care less if you do or do not like me.  If you're dumb enough to visit my blog via facebook and then proceed to trash me, I suggest you do me a favor and defriend me.   If you want to personally assault me on my own blog, please put your name.  Otherwise, your comments will not be posted. Should you choose to identify yourself, I will be more than happy to re-post your comments.  I value your opinion, but my blog is to serve no other purpose than for shits and giggles.  Nothing posted should be taken literally and if you don't find it entertaining and/or think it's creepy, quit reading it.  It's not rocket science.

-Stay Sassy, xo

Gone skiing...

Enjoy your weekend everyone!  I'm spending time with my college bestie in Denver for a Passions Party (ow ow) and then on to Vail to be a hot little snow bunny!  I'm hoping to purposely crash in to a hot skier/snow boarder who turns out to be the man out of my dreams and who then takes me back to his cabin to warm me up by the fire.  I love hot coco!  And considering Vail is one of the more expensive mountains to ski at, hopefully he'll be able to afford my fine tastes of Yurman, Tory Burch, Louboutin, Burberry, etc. Just kidding!  It would make for a good blog though...

-Stay Sassy, xo

Back to December

So I know there are several people out there who can't stand Taylor Swift...but I am not one of them.  Love it or hate it, I happen to love her and most of her songs.  I love her lyrics and can relate to a lot of them.  "Back to December" is her newest release from her latest CD "Speak Now."  Quick synopses - the song is reportedly about her short lived relationship with Taylor Lautner that ended last December.  

Although I cannot quite relate to every specific lyric in this song, I like it and there are some lines in it I can relate to.  More than anything, I probably have a guy or two in mind saying these things to me when I listen to it.  There's no way I want to go back to any point in my past relationships and change what happened so we could still be together today, but there are things I have done I would apologize for.  Anyway, I of course have the CD and listened on my drive back to STL yesterday.  When this song came on, it got me thinking about last December, and the December before that.  Making the 3-1/2 hour drive, I had plenty of time to reflect on how much my live has changed yearly, most notably over the past 5 years.   

Oh what a difference a year (or five) can make...
Dec 2005 - I was embarking on my last semester of college. What a whirl wind that was. I was enrolling in my last semester of undergrad and preparing for SB06 with my closest friends - a week that will go down as the best spring break ever under the worst possible circumstances. Life was good.

Dec 2006 - still wondering what to do with my life, I stayed in Lawrence and pretended to still be in college.  I was "happily" still dating my future husband (one of many "future husbands" I've dated over the years). I was excited to be accepted in to KU's School Of Med MPH program and planning to make the move to KC in the future months.

Dec 2007 was a bit different. I was on again/off again with my college bf as I battled for his attention and competed with his frat brothers as he partied away his last year of college. I think I even went home with him for Christmas - a place I never exactly felt welcome at. Thank God that didn't work out.

December 2008 - happily living in KC I was still working on my MPH and working. I enjoyed the holidays with all of my new friends I had met over the past year and who are still among my best friends!  I had a few new love interests and was so happy!  But there was one who I was most interested in and remember exchanging small gifts every day up until Christmas.  Thinking back, those were probably some of the most thoughtful gifts I've ever received.

Dec 2009 - my first december in STL. I was preparing for my trip to Buenos Aires to see my latest love interest and will forever remember that amazing trip. I was happy and couldn't imagine life getting any better. Little did I know how much would change over the ensuing year.

Dec 2010 - here were are. The past 12 months have been full of roller-coaster emotions.  Between the hardest year of my life academically and emotionally, I have survived and am stronger.  I lost a love and a best friend within a matter of days.  I dealt with the loss of an amazing friend, Dylan.  But the craziness of it all, within that short span of days, an amazing life was brought in to the world as well, baby Gunnar. In regards to school I can't believe I am embarking on 2011 and will soon be in the clinic actually taking care of patients...a thought that thrills me and scares me shitless at the same time. I never thought this day would come!  I'm one year closer to being Mel Plouv, MMS, PA-C, MPH!  Even though 2010 was a hard year, it was probably the biggest year of change for me on a personal level...and for that I would never go back to any other December.


-Stay Sassy, xo    

Dear Ex-Boyfriend

Dear Ex-Boyfriend,

This is a friendly reminder that we have been broken up for several years now, yet you still continue to act like a child every time I see you.  I'm really confused by it.  It's clear that you are not a fan of me considering you blocked me on facebook and gchat years ago...which forces me to ask mutual friends how you are doing.  I just don't get why we must continue to pretend as if we do not know one another after being inseparable for several years.  I'm just wondering - is this because after a year of dicking me around you finally realized what you had and it was a little too late?  Did I upset you because I decided I was done dealing with your bullshit?  If so, that's your own fault.  But for the record, I do not think it is necessary for you to exit a bar when I approach a group of our mutual friends or blatantly ignore me when we are at the same social event.  That's just pathetic and immature.  People date for a reason and usually a part of that is because they care about one another and enjoy each other's company.  Even though things didn't work out between us (clearly for the best), I still care about you and wish you all the happiness in the world.  With that being said, the next time we run in to one another, I'm hoping your balls have dropped and you are able to maturely say hello.  I hope things work out with the horse.

I wish you nothing but the best,
Your Ex-Girlfriend

-Stay Sassy, xo

The fine line of aggressive dating

I'm not sure how many of you catch Millionaire Matchmaker, but I DVR it and watch it weekly.  This past week's episode really got me thinking.  Patti talks to her female millionaire this week about having too much "masculine energy" which in turn is why the "good guys" aren't asking her out...even though she's gorgeous.  Patti says that Leah is too aggressive for a "masculine energy man"...whatever that means.  But anyway, that got me to thinking.  Am I too aggressive?  And what exactly is too aggressive?  Overly aggressive to me would be going up to a random guy that you don't even know and more or less letting him know you wanted to go home with him tonight...whether you say it just like that or you tell him you want to beep his brains out.  My first thought was to ask every guy on my gchat list.  So I asked each of them, pretty open-endly, "Tell me what you think about aggressive girls...turn on or off?" Here's a few answers that I received.  Names have been changed, but ages haven't.


"In the bar, bedroom, or life in general?  Bar, yes.  Bedroom, yes.  General life, pain in the ass." -Matt, 24


"It's a delicate balance.  Showing she's interested is a turn on.  Taking control, turn off.  Unless she's a super-babe, then it doesn't matter at first." -Thomas, 26


"I personally like it. I mean I wouldn't ever be with my future wife if it wasn't for her taking the initiative.  But there is a fine line.  A girl has to make it apparent that she likes you, but she shouldn't go too far and make you think she wants to have sex with you.  She should control that part.  But when alcohol is involved it's a slightly different story." -Brian, 28


"In most cases, a turn on.  I think it can go both ways.  I also like the thrill of the chase." -Chad, 29


"Well in my opinion a little sassy is always nice.  However, sensors are good too.  Sexually aggressive is a huge turn on to me." -Paul, 30

Until I watched the last episode of Millionaire Matchmaker, I understood aggressive to mean confident.  But maybe I'm way off.  I think it's hot when someone knows who and what they want in life.  Now Patti has me TOTALLY freaked out and confused.  I know some of you reading my blog do not know me personally, but those who do should know that I am pretty confident and open - especially sexually.  I think it's important to be in tune to your own sexuality.  Sex is a good thing.  Sometimes I say things that may be considered inappropriate...usually after a Jack Daniels cocktail or two...or four.  But until this episode, I never really thought about it being a turn off.  I have been known to "go after what I want" whether it be for that night or for a relationship.  But now I'm wondering if I should tone it down a notch.   

There's always the flip side to everything.  If I tone down my "aggressiveness," then am I trying to be someone I'm not?  If a guy doesn't like me for me, then what good is that going to do?  I'm not someone who charms guys by playing dumb, acting like an air head and letting them call all the shots.  If I like you, you'll know it.  And if I'm too aggressive for you, well I guess I'm sorry.  I love aggressive guys, but if I'm aggressive, does that mean aggressive guys don't like me?  Am I even aggressive?  Or just confident?  I'm so confused!

Based on my scientific research, I think we can conclude that men like an aggressive woman in the bedroom...check!  In the "real world" of dating, I guess we as females are supposed to sit back and let the guy set the pace and tell US when he wants to take US out.  Or at least in the beginning...which is sorta hard for me to do considering I get a little impatient.  I'm pretty sure the last guy I "dated" (and I use that term lightly) can vouch for that.  His idea was a date every other week - not kosher in my book.  If you tell me you like me (which he did), then you're making time to hang out with me (which he did not).  Bottom line.  If you don't like me, oh well.  To that I say...NEXT IN LINE, PLEASE!

I leave you with the words of Carrie Bradshaw, "Maybe some women aren't meant to be tamed. Maybe they just need to run free until they find someone just as wild to run with them."


...and still the unanswered question...what is too aggressive?

-Stay Sassy, xo

True Life: I'M GETTING MARRIED!

Can you believe it?!  I'm making it BLOG official!!!  I am getting MARRIED!!!  

GET REAL!  I am so far from getting engaged it's not even funny.  But my future engagement ring is so pretty isn't it?  As we all know, with the holidays comes Facebook announcements of couples all over the world getting engaged.  I swear every day I log on, someone else is engaged and I am again reminded I am not.  In years past it annoyed me.  But this year it's different.  This year instead of me telling everyone congrats and smiling but inside feeling jealousy towards the huge rock the latest person just received, I am personally content with my life and where I am.  YES I am almost 27 years old and YES I am 100% single and NO I have no desire to be with anyone right now except for my battery operated friend, Hiroshima.  The only person I'm in a monogamous relationship with is myself!  But the glory of it all, I AM IN LOVE WITH IT!  I have finally fallen in love with myself and couldn't be happier.  Singleness has brought me a completely new perspective on life and I have finally learned to love it.  I have gained so much independence and insight over the past 8 months it's unbelievable.  Someone who shall remain nameless attempted to belittle me by telling me because I go home alone at night, "the joke is on me."  But the sad part of that statement is how pathetic it is to judge happiness based on whether or not you have someone to go home to.  Joke is actually on YOU because you rely on "man" to make you happy.  And you're a mean girl, so clearly you suck.

Doesn't it look good on me?
www.tivol.com

I never realized how important it was to love yourself before you can love someone else and I am finally there.  So, congrats to all of you who are recently engaged (especially my best friend from high school, Ashley).  I can finally say I am truly SO happy for YOU and all the other engagements to come (specifically for the celebrations to follow).  But I am MORE HAPPY FOR ME!  And just for future references, IF my future husband is reading this blog right now, here is the ring I expect when I finally find you.  And just so you know, it can be found at Tivol in Kansas City for the small fee of $60,000.  Also, I'd like an engagement party immediately following (a surprise of course) with all of my best friends to celebrate...

-Stay Sassy, xo


P.S. A special shout out to whoever it was who called me and left me a voicemail singing a romantic country song.  It was very sweet and I wish I could thank you.  But considering you blocked your number, I cannot do that.  So, thank you.